You Control Your Destiny Switch

Although I am working through all the exercises and tools from the book Coach Yourself to Success, I am currently reading a book called Your Destiny Switch by Peggy McColl and have been thinking a great deal about what she is saying. So I'm adding some of what I'm learning and thinking about as it does coincide with some principles from Coach Yourself to Success as well.

The author's premise is that you are the controller of your destiny because you are the controller of the emotions you want to feel. Learning how to create the emotions you desire to feel will give you a sense of internal power which will lead to growth and fulfillment. There are 4 constants in going down the path of achieving your destiny: 1) Managing negative emotions is the key that allows you to move toward your destiny 2)Knowledge, a deep understanding, and practical application all have to be utilized together to achieve your goal 3) Negative emotions are often destructive to the achievement of goals 4) "To have it all, you must be willing to give it all up". The author says that "if you feel deserving of it, you can create it". In a nutshell, the author is saying that our emotions are so powerful that they shape our destinies, and that we can control the degree of positive to negative emotions.

There are 4 key positive emotions and their negative counterparts that she describes as being on a continuum. The first is Love and Hate. Second is Wonder and Emptiness. Third is Bliss and Depression. Fourth is Faith and Worry. Each of these emotions and their negatives operate as if on a dimmer switch, that you can control. When you choose to turn up the Bliss, automatically that takes away power from the Depression. The same goes for the other 3 opposites. Not only this, but as you turn up just one of the positive emotions, the other positive emotions tend to rise a bit also. And here is her key to the whole book: No one is responsible for your feelings but you-ever! And when you allow negative emotions to take over, you are actually disempowering yourself and creating a spiraling downward movement.

What she is stressing is to let yourself recognize what emotion you are feeling, acknowledge it, think about why you may be feeling that way, learn from it, and replace it with its positive counterpart. For example, if you feel a degree of real dislike toward a neighbor, she is saying that it is not beneficial to you to hold onto that dislike and that it actually inhibits your own growth. You are to recognize that you feel dislike, acknowledge why that may be, and the choose to let go of that emotion and replace it with loving feelings toward your neighbor. You may have to think about a time when you felt love in order to get that emotion to the surface in order to be able to show it to your neighbor. But this is the key to creating a life of mostly positive emotions, and destiny fulfillment.

The positive emotions actually bring you positive rewards and results.
The author talks about each emotion, both negative and positive, as having their own energy waves as based on scientific research! Therefore it really is true that what you feel, you will attract (because the energy waves are the same). So if you want to attract loving people in your life, you have to emit love yourself. If you want to attract bliss, you have to emit bliss. This may seem a challenge when you are spiraling down in a sea of negative emotions, but she says to recognize the strongest of the negative feelings and then determine what its opposite emotion is, and call up that feeling in order to replace the negative feeling. The author says "...when you do the work of creating positive emotions, you'll become a magnet, drawing in all that you desire".

Of all the emotions, love is the most powerful positive emotion and encompasses all the other positive emotions. So when you are feeling particularly negative toward someone, stop, call up the emotion of love, and direct it toward that individual. You'll be amazed at how good you feel, and how the other person responds to that positive energy.

I had a person in mind that I kept feeling angry toward. We have different approaches to situations and it leaves me feeling frustrated and powerless. So, I said a prayer to have this person cross my path so that I could change the atmosphere between us. This prayer was answered on that very day, and I chose to be loving and appreciative of this person. The interaction was very enjoyable. I have yet to see how this type of interacting will help to take care of our differences in our processes, but I will continue to choose my emotions towards him rather than letting the negative emotions control me. I expect great things from this approach. Already, it has left me feeling happier and more upbeat. I also chose to be caring toward someone else who has been particularly hard to feel that way about. I did this by listening well (one of my exercises from the other book for which I am continually improving) and giving my time. It was just amazing, the positive energy that surrounded us, and attracted others over to join us!

One of the most powerful ways I think this can be utilized is with yourself. We are all eager to believe negative things about ourselves and often dismiss positive things. As children of God, we are all created how He perfectly made us, to fulfill a specific role in the universe. We are all given challenges and lessons that by learning from them, we will be better able to help those we have been called to help. Therefore, the negative things we let ourselves believe serve no purpose but to hold us back from recognizing that we are perfect for the role He created us to fill. By focusing on our positive attributes, we can more easily move into our roles and recognize our special talents and gifts.

I have a specific negative thought that is the hardest for me to overcome. So I am practicing her method of recognizing when I am feeling negative, finding the cause and the specific emotion, and then dismissing it and replacing it with the opposite emotion and not just feeling it, but feeling like I have an abundance of that emotion. Again, it goes back to the energy that each emotion emits. Over the last several days, I do feel as though my encounters with sales people, people in public and neighbors has been friendlier and more enjoyable- A good reason not to choose to dwell in negative emotions but to rid yourself of them as quickly as possible!