More Off the List of Energy Drains!

If you would have told me last year that I would spend a large part of my highly prized vacation time, working on getting my list of 60ish "energy drains" eliminated, I would have just laughed! However, I have seen the effects of just what eliminating a few from the list has done for my outlook, my energy, my desire for more from life, and my excitement about the possibilities for my life. So, I decided to see how many I could get off my list (while still having some fun here and there!)

Most of the items I have addressed while on vacation, have been home repair and improvement items- things I have a hard time taking care of when I am traveling. My thinking is, is that by getting them taken care of now will allow me to think more clearly and creatively and with more focus when I am home. I hope to gain more perspective on how I'd like to spend my time when it's not distracted by these nuisances.

So I've turned into a "handy lady" and have installed new hardware on the kitchen and bath cabinets; stained some needed touch-ups; repainted the bathroom; installed a new light fixture in the bathroom; took down the builder-grade mirror (ugh, safety glasses are really important- flying shards get pretty good velocity as evidenced by the one I got stuck in my cheek!); hung two new framed mirrors and painted a towel bar; removed the rust stain from the tub; bought a new toilet (will install tomorrow--- with help!); reorganized the under sink storage and made another trip to the good will; and most exciting of all is that I get my new floors installed on Wednesday!

I'll have to go back and review the list, but I've knocked off some biggies this vacation and am okay with spending my time this way as it will gain me more quality home time in the near future!

Tomorrow I am painting all the baseboards, trim and doors so that I won't have to do any painting when the new floors are in. I should just hire this done since it's one of those jobs that is on the "not enjoyable" list and someone else could feasibly do it. Oh well, it may be therapeutic (OK, who am I kidding- I'd rather be out doing almost anything but painting trim-- say, lounging by the pool. I guess I can do that while they are installing the floors. Hmmm, go to store, get margarita ingredients, get good fiction book, get great toenail polish and blow up my floaty... Yes, I have a great vacation day planned for Wednesday!)

I have become a firm believer in getting rid of energy sappers on the road to "Getting the Goal". I see how much I've been able to accomplish already, done repairs and improvement that I wouldn't have tried before, and am gaining better insight about myself through the process!

Creating Energy By Decluttering

Oh the task that loomed ahead of me caused me great dread! The decluttering of my overstuffed, undersized bedroom (or multipurpose room as it is a bedroom/coat closet/linen closet/storage room). This little room housed an a great quantity of "stuff". I couldn't wait to get rid of some of this "stuff", but didn't really know how to get started.

So one Friday afternoon I just opened up the closet door and started pulling things out, making piles for 1)give away 2)keep and 3)throw out (unfortunately nothing I have to eliminate would net me a large sum of money so no use in using Craig's List or Ebay. Does that say anything about what I own?? I hope not!) After working for several hours on this, I had to quit for the day, but the bedroom was such a disaster area that I couldn't sleep there for two nights. Sleeping on the sofa was definitely incentive to get this task completed! So I spent another full day reorganizing and eliminating til there was nothing to store under the bed, behind the door or on the floor of the closet. My jeep was so stuffed with things to donate, I could barely see out the back window! Oh how light I felt after getting rid of this "stuff". My clothes were organized and wouldn't get wrinkled just from hanging in an overstuffed closet, and I could get something off the shelf without an avalanche of clothes toppling on my head! Who knew this could bring such joy! And then I pondered how I could have ever gotten this much stuff. Now I am completely repulsed by the thought of shopping! I have just enough space for everything I have. So I now know that a new purchase will require an elimination. Oh that makes shopping so much more interesting (and less costly than before!). Even when I was out of town and hadn't packed something warm enough, I had to really debate with myself about purchasing something new. What would I get rid of? Can I find something inexpensive that will get utilized for many occassions. It took awhile, but the versatile piece was found (and the elimination was made when I got home). That'll teach me to not pack properly!! And for the this shoe lover, the task of eliminating shoes was tough. Do I miss them. Nope. I should've done this long ago! Do I want to buy more shoes. Well, yes. Will I? Not without getting rid of a pair! I'm sticking to the rule!

And as for the whole Feng Shui thing that says that you shouldn't store things under the bed- I have become a believer. I now love my bed and my bedroom and feel so peaceful there. Weird huh?! But it's true, not storing stuff under there gives good energy to the room!

Next up, the kitchen! It's a tiny kitchen, but took me a whole day to declutter. I made the most of it, because as I found items I hadn't seen for a while, I had to test them out. Early in the day, I found a smoothie machine and all day long I tried new inventions like iced coffee, iced caramel coffee, pink lemonade smoothie, and whatever else I had on hand. The smoothie machine was definitely a keeper. So far the George Forman has been kept, but I'm not sure why. Anyway, the kitchen turned out great, and once again, the Goodwill loves me. I've almost considered an open house to show off the joy I have about my new space!

To celebrate my efforts, tomorrow I get to go to the flooring store and order my new floors! I couldn't be more excited. Thank you Talane Miedaner for offering these decluttering tips! Try it and you'll be amazed at the boost you get from doing this!

Eliminating Pesky Annoyances and Energy Drains

In order to build a solid foundation to enable the focus and energy needed for personal growth and development, you need to free up some energy, time and space. These are finite commodities, so when they are not utilized efficiently, our goals are often competing with less important tasks, relationships, communications and activities. (Watching "The Biggest Loser" comes to mind as does reading Star magazine, listening to anything Nancy Pelosi says...you get my drift). Our energy is divided among many, many things versus spending it on what really matters to us and what brings us peace, joy, excitement and fulfillment. In her book Coaching Yourself to Success, Talane Miedaner says that "Everything you are tolerating, drains your energy, makes you irritable and wears you down." Her task for me, to really open my eyes to all those things I am just tolerating and that are draining my energy, was to make a list of 60-100 things that I am/was just tolerating. The following is (most of) my list:

Things I am Just Tolerating:
1. Dingy grout in the tub
2. Rust stain in the tub
3. Tile and carpet I dislike
4. Dead outdoor plants
5. Clutter under the bed
6. Overstuffed closet
7. Exterior deterioration of my condo and property
8. Cat spray smell outside my condo door
9. My old kitchen and bathroom counters
10.Having no knobs on the kitchen cabinets
11.Piece of unstained/unmatching wood in kitchen
12.Microwave sitting on the counter
13.Messy, stuffed pantry
14.Broken vacuum cleaner
15.Bathroom vanity (ugly/no storage space)
16.Social life
17.Bathroom light fixture
18.Kitchen light fixture
19.Desk with no drawers/storage
20.Sliding doors-hard to open
21.Plumbing needs changed
22.Electrical fuse box needs updated
23.Property landscaping/entrance is ugly
24.Lack of family close by
25.Job-schedule
26.Long drive to amentities (church, running club, classes, etc)
27.Lack of things in common with neighbors
28.Job-underappreciated by customers and boss
29.Job-being away from home so often
30.Eating alone
31.Condo Board of Directors-slow to accomplish improvements
32.Lack of regular, stimulating conversation
33.No dating life
34.Clutter in bedroom (too much furniture, stuff behind door)
35.Pollen on outdoor furniture
36.My pearly off-whites
37.Gym-not open 24 hours; lacks classes I want
38.Lack of close friendships in town
39.Job-unfulfilling work; unstimulating work
40.Bad allergies
41.Facebook
42.Lack of support system in town
43.Watches with dead batteries
44.Tarnished jewelry
45.Messy and unattractive ring and watch holder in bathroom
46.Messy undersink storage in bathroom
47.Stuffed and messy outdoor storage
48.(relationship)
49.Worrying about identity theft
50.Ugly mirror in bathroom
51.Dripping water in bathroom
52.Necklace storage-incovenient and unattractive
53.Unclean condo
54.Noisy neighbor
55.Lack of coat closet
56.Lack of book shelves
57.Lack of spare bedroom
58.Lack of storage for gear (bicycle, motorcycle)
59.Baseboards (ugly, need painted)
60.Kitchen faucet
61.No vent hood on stove
62.(relationships-work)
63.Lack of cultural things close by
64.Car-needs vacuumed

In creating this list, what stood out was how "stuff" played a major part in draining my energy- specifically, too much stuff! Some of the other energy drains regarding relationships, support and work may require some energy to deal with so I decided to get that energy by eliminating the drains that could get me momentum.

I've wanted to update the condo for at least a year, and now have realized that the clutter and stuff was detouring me from this goal. So decluttering was where I've decided to start--and didn't get far before being distracted by a gorgeous spring day! Using that to my advantage, I tackled some of the outdoor energy drains. I picked up my new and lovely plants, decided to downsize the number this year to minimize the energy they'd take to keep alive (what with my black thumb and all), put my headphones on, and potted away the day! Not only are the new plants gorgeous, but I took some time to clean off the outdoor furniture, touch up paint, and throw out my unwelcoming welcome mat! What do you know, but my entrance has become more welcoming and inviting! I get a burst of happiness and energy every time I see the pretty blooms and clean, tidy space outside! I did realize that one more thing that was within my control needed to be addressed and that was the cat spray smell left by my front door by the neighbor's cat in an effort to show his dislike for my indoor pets. No, I can't eliminate the cat (...or can I???), so I concocted a cleaning solvent and scrubbed away. The smell is gone and just to be sure the cat doesn't come close anymore, I left orange aroma by my entrance which is suppose to repel cats. In addition, I posted a notice reminding residents of the deed restrictions concerning pets, and much to my joy, the roaming cat population has diminished to almost none, and they haven't been back to spray in front of my door- Now that's an energy booster! (And the chores I were dreading were turned into fun by a sunny, warm day and great music and no rushing to get them done!)

In the next article, I will eliminate the energy drains from my overstuffed, undersized bedroom (or multipurpose room as it is a bedroom/storage room/spare bedroom/coat closet/attic- but thank God not a bathroom too!). See how this task has changed my outlook on shopping, shoes and feng shui!

Building a Solid Foundation for Change

Welcome to my first and most important endeavor to change my life and enable me to be succesful in defining and achieving future goals. In her book "Coach Yourself to Success" Talane Miedaner states that the very first principle that you need to address is to build a solid foundation for change by reducing distractions and energy drains, and replacing them with "positive, nurturing energy boosters."

So the questions I asked myself were "What is the most obvious, glaring energy drain in my life? What is it that I hide behind, turn to for relief, use as a distraction but gives me nothing in return but a false sense of comfort?" This was an easy question for me, but the hardest thing in my life to tackle. We all have a primary crutch we use to avoid facing the troubling things in our lives and it only serves to take away our energy and confidence to change! It may be shopping, acohol, food, work, drugs, or busy-ness. I, myself, considered avoiding this particular issue and moving on to other smaller distractions and energy sappers. But what really, then, is the point of going through this process if I'm not willing to do the most important steps? Could I be successful without addressing this glaring issue. Absolutely not. Part of success is to be honest with yourself and with others. And just the very act of removing the lie from your life will change how you feel about yourself. So beware, this is a heavy topic to begin with, but without tackling this first, the successive exercises would be pointless. Anyway, I usually like to get the hard tasks out of the way first and then free up my mind and energy for more enjoyable, fun tasks.

I am finally addressing the crutch I've used for 14 years. It has been the number one distraction, addiction, and escape mechanism of my life. It has held me prisoner and the prison kept encompassing more and more of my life, taking more energy and focus away from passions and purposeful living and most importantly, relationships. Divided focus decreases the ability for success because energy is not fully devoted to one goal. Without tackling this obstacle, I would never reach my full potential because I was hiding my true self, even from me. How would I know my goals, passions, desires, and needs if I wouldn't allow myself to explore these things? Without this foundation of identifying true goals and passions,I may waste valuable time and energy pursuing some goal about which I would ultimately not be passionate. So if I am going to change my life, I am going to do it with a solid foundation.

My primary obstacle is my eating disorder. (For you it could be food addiction, alcohol addiction, drug addiction, work-aholism, a relationship, or anything you turn to for comfort that is negatively impacting your life and/or hindering you from accomplishing goals). For many months I had been asking God to help me with this obstacle. But inside I didn't have the desire to really change it because I was afraid. What I needed to change was the desire to eliminate this behavior from my life. I needed the desire to learn to love who I was and to focus on what my life could be without crutches.

I began praying regularly for the desire to change this behavior. After weeks went by, I began to wonder if I was still praying for the wrong thing because I was still as desperate as ever for God to help me. I felt like opportunities were waiting for me and I was fearful that I would waste more years of my life with this addiction. One Sunday morning, I was sitting in church and the pastor was talking about vows made to God and how making a vow and breaking it is far worse than never making it in the first place. "Well, here is my answer" I thought to myself. Now it isn't going to be about me, but about my love and respect and honor of God. So while we had silent prayer time, I vowed to God that I would not participate in this destructive behavior again. I vowed to let God lead me me through healing and help me focus on His will for my life. I cried to God knowing that only He could help me, and I'd let go of the control. I was terrified of facing the inevitable anxiety that would come. And was terrified as to how I would get through it. God is miraculous. He has helped me shift my focus onto the hope He has given me. He has helped to reduce my usually incessant thinking about food. Talane suggests that 'where you place your focus is where you place your energy'. To remove my focus from food, my energy went to reading, learning, relationships, getting enough sleep, and so much more that I couldn't find the time for prior, because the eating disorder was so exhausting.

It has been 25 days, and I am thrilled that I have been 100 percent successful. With the hope I've found in my ability to live a fulfilling life and with God's blessings, I've found positive outlets for reducing my anxieties such as writing, reading, praying, taking a walk, talking to friends or family, or just plain focusing on something or someone else. I also pray often for God's strength and guidance. When I find myself starting to focus on weight and food and how to shed extra weight, I consciously shift my focus to accepting the weight while trying to make healthier food choices. And then I continue to focus on something positive. I am also letting God lead me and letting hunger be my guide. After 14 years of not eating properly, knowing what a real meal looks like is hard to grasp and the sensation of "fullness" is still uncomfortable. It will take more time and acceptance and more learning, but in the meantime, I thank God for the message Coach Yourself To Success has given me, and I am thankful for the new desires and excitement that He has given me on which to focus!

By ridding myself of distractions and energy sappers that inhibit me from fully knowing and pursuing goals, I can build a solid foundation of positive energy, discovered passions and desires, and appropriate goals. Already, I have found new loves. I had never really enjoyed "relaxing" before, because I couldn't. Now I can! And I observe so much more about my environment such as smells and sounds; I enjoy engaging in conversation with people wherever I am; I find that I am smiling easier, laughing more, and singing often. I am finding pure joy in writing; and learning is a joy because I have confidence I can put what I've learned into practice. I enjoy lighting candles. I can enjoy a relaxing bath. But most noticeable is my ability to focus more easily on what I am trying to accomplish, read or learn. I am learning more about my likes and dislikes, which is guiding me in my effort to learn what success is going to mean for my life!

I hope you will take this huge step with me and turn your life toward success. Identify your biggest crutch, distraction, or addiction which limits your ability to reach your potential. You will be amazed at what you learn about yourself that you couldn't see before. Seek the strength of God in this journey, or a close friend or family, but get started today! And let me know how it's going!

(Because of the enormity of this task, there will be continued learning and frustrations as I learn to completely shift my focus away from this issue. I will be working on it for a long while, but will only follow up on progress occassionally. But the true focus of this blog is to write about all the activities I pursue in an effort to coach myself to success. I have additional steps towards building my solid foundation in the articles to come which are much simpler and offer a more immediate reward of more energy, time or space.)