Setbacks and Learning Opportunities

Over the past couple weeks, the struggle to remember all I'd been learning and accomplishing has challenged me. I didn't take the time to remember and choose to handle the stressful situations that arose, with purposeful thought and prayer. But I am getting back on track. I have worked hard on surrending to God, acknowledging that I felt deserted and vulnerable through the trials, and to realize that I need to prepare for major stressors. I will do this by immediately turning to God and reaffirming my faith that He will take care of me; then, I will reach out to loved ones who can share perspectives that I may not see in the moment. The setback ended up being longer than I could've imagined and it was shocking to feel such progress slip backwards; but I had had such a wonderful taste of energy, hope, joy and freedom, that I am spending all my energy on God's word, praying, choosing to do positive, re-affirming activities, and continuing to read through and really understand my coaching books. What a difference in my entire spirit and being whe I choose to engage in growth and learning and loving.

These past seveal days, I have reallized how improtant it is to show love to everyone I encounter and to love those I am around, instead of wishing I could be near family or long time friends who are far away. By looking to love those around me, I also increase my ability to love more deeply and I give those around me the opportunity to feel love, which makes them feel good too. Even when my first inclination has been to be annoyed about something, I stop (in theory-every time:) and remind myself that loving the person first will help me deal with them in a respectful way, and gives God the power to judge instead of me. I can pray on the issue that troubles me and then let God guide the direction towards a resolution.

This has worked positively with someone in my neighborhood who I have been judgmental of in the past for things I considered stealing and lying. By focusing on loving him for him, flaws and all, I can more clearly see the good intentions he does have and let God work within him to convert some of the dishonesty I see from him. We have a much better relationship and I can see this continuing in the future.

Their is another neighbor whom I had shied away from in the recent past because I didn't agree with how I felt he was handling a situation that involves all his neighbors and I also didn't feel like we had much in common. But just accepting and loving people for who they are is more important than my judgment is. The whole "log in the eye" bible quotation comes to mind as I work on removing judgements. When I chose to accept and love him for who he is, I started to see him as someone who is struggling with having a satifying life. He has had some challenges this past year and he is coping in his way, just as I have coped in a destructive way with my struggles. Wow, my high-horse just threw me off!

I have also made a conscious decision to slow down my days as much as I can to include time for impromptu chats with neighbors, lunches or dinners with friends, and phone calls. This past week, many opportunities arose because I had the time for them and they all turned out to be such positive experiences. It's amazing when you take the time to show people that they are important to you, what a difference it makes in the relationship you have with them! In the past, I struggled with knowing that I needed to show people this because I could not see why it would matter to them that I valued them (and this is because I didn't value myself enough to see that).

So, when I take the time to remember to turn to God first, and also to respond with love towards people as my first emotion, outcomes will always be better than if I choose a different approach!